HeidiSuperstar

I've even ran out of titles.

2012-01-27T20:34:00.000-08:00

The reason why I've only been posting pictures and not writing much in this space is because I kinda feel like I've run out of things to say. As much as I may be having a lot of fun elsewhere, I really don't feel the need of coming here and say " Omg did you know I had like the most awesome day ever???" and then keep blabbing away. And I tend to keep my thoughts to myself now. In any case, I still do share my life and thoughts will people I'm comfortable with. For that, it won't change.

Pictures!

At Bella Pasta for Gervee's 21st Birthday

Calamari for starters

Salmon pizza

Mushroom pizza

All of us

CNY

So gonna miss these girls when we graduate in about two weeks time!

H♥

Instagrams

2012-01-20T23:54:00.000-08:00

Insta pics to sum up my days once again.

Best book, thus far.

Crystal Jade xlb

Muddy mud pie from TCC

Somebody's brother baked brownies

Dreamcatcher from Nelson, he made it on his own, I swear.

Indian food @ Holland Village

Foster The People concert tix from Hansel :)

The result of being vertically challenged

After much attempts to squeeze and get a better view

Day out with Bella

Can you tell?

*face palms*

Turkish dinner @ Fareast

New film camera (water proof) from Hansel, I'm gna have so much fun with it!

Life's been good. Been shopping so much, eating so much and laughing so much. What more can I ask for? I'm excited for Gerv's 21st birthday tomorrow! Then followed by CNY which is just a couple of days away hehe.

I want to watch The Vaccines live!!! *hints*

CALL IT WHAT YOU WANTTTTT

2012-01-14T17:29:00.000-08:00

Foster The People concert tonight!!! STOKEDDDDDDD.

See you there if you're going too ~

Shove

2012-01-11T21:35:00.000-08:00

Hello you ;)

She said "Show me the world that's inside your head
Show me the world that you see yourself, you can use some help
Cause sometimes it comes with a shove, when you fall in love"

HAPPY 2012!!!!

2012-01-02T16:27:00.000-08:00

Happy New Year everybody! I'm not too late right? It's only the 2nd day of 2012. I'm really excited for this year. I told myself back in 2011 (just a couple of days ago) that I want to leave everything behind, all the shit that happened last year, I want to forget it. It's a new year, new life, and the start of new beginnings! PSYCHEDDDD.

Anyway, I spent my countdown pretty well. It was a tiring day but I enjoyed every bit of it.

On the 31st of Dec 2011; USS with Stephy poo and friends.

I'm so afraid of heights even though it isn't the first time I took roller coasters hahaha. Oh and the Transformers Ride is a MUST TRY. It's really thrilling and fun!

Super huge pizza!!!

Then off to meet Ryan and the rest for the countdown party at Siloso Beach!

I remember how when the whole group of us managed to brave the long queue and got into Siloso beach, it was half an hour left before the countdown. So we all ran like crazy all the way to the Countdown venues at a speed I never thought I could ever go. HAHA. The fireworks were amazing, and the Foam pool probably topped up the night with even more fun for me. But as a result of that, my camera died because it got wet. But who cares? "New year, new camera!" as quoted from Ryan. I'm gonna get a waterproof one this time round.

I've actually prepared an entire post for 2011. I compiled pictures which summed up my year but didn't have time to post it up because of the activities packed back to back. I think it's a little too late to have them up here right? I'm still contemplating though.

I'm having high hopes for 2012, can't wait to see what's installed for me this year. Once again, Happy New Year people! Let's start this year right!

Zouk

2011-12-29T14:33:00.000-08:00

"I can never do anything in peace, you're forever taking pictures of everything I do" - Ryan

xoxo

This was what made up my Christmas

2011-12-27T17:08:00.000-08:00

Open Door Policy.

Earl Grey Tea.

Ginger bread man!

Ice cream waffle with Christmas berries!

Chocolate spoons that make awesome hot cocoa :)

^^

@ Mbs :)

This one's lovely

Mum

Sunday service @ Indoor Stadium, the performances were amazing.

From Ryan when he went to Bintan :)

sk8terb0iz

BBQ with the family

Wendy baby

Back to school for filming despite the festive occasion

All the way from Perth, better late than never :)

Christmas celebration lasted for a few days for me. What can I say? It was amazing! Definitely unforgettable :) Oh, and I love Instagram hahaha.

Looking forward to Christmas

2011-12-23T18:56:00.000-08:00

The weather's been so good, I get so lazy to go out. As much I always tell myself that I NEED TO SHOP, I just always seem to succumb to the temptation of lazing around in bed. I don't want to be out on the streets having to brave the storm and get myself all soaking wet. So I resort to online shopping! I've been ordering so many clothes online. My shoes just came yesterday and this morning, I just ordered another pair. Mum's gonna kill me when she sees all the countless packages arriving at our doorstep :/

I'm so excited for Christmas! It's always the best time of the year where everyone seems so happy it makes me happy to see others happy hahaha. Starting tomorrow I'll be going out and enjoying my Christmas to the fullest. So psyched about ittttt! I think I'll really be having a good time for the next two days or so.

Meanwhile Merry Christmas and Happy holidays to everyone out there! xx

I would do anything for you

2011-12-20T23:37:00.000-08:00

Am about to crash from an exhausting day of crying like a baby because my Piano got taken away from me. You don't know how much the Piano means to me, all the sentimental value that was taken away along with it. Bye bye baby, I will miss you. I already did the moment I saw them wrapping you up with plastic. I hate everyone who helped to have you move out of the house. I swear. I wish my daddy didn't allow all that to happen. I hate today, sigh.

My head still kinda hurts from all the sobbing.

Goodnight.

10th Dec

2011-12-11T20:34:00.000-08:00

So, where do I begin? I had this extremely long/exhausting/exciting/boring/good day this Saturday. For the past week, I've been doing nothing but rushing for my portfolio. I'm this close to done. I'm just left with the broadcast, so I figured I should just reward myself a day off everything. Coincidentally, it's my best friend's birthday so why not? :)

Have you guys walked down the streets of Orchard Road lately and saw this line of extremely beautiful men parading their shirtless bodies there? Because if you haven't, you should. Before A&F opens on Thurs and they'll be gone then :(

You have no idea how much I had to control my hormones when I saw them hahahaha keeeding. But seriously, they're really hot.

I like this model the most. He's Singaporean but his dad is a Japanese/Portuguese. Well at least that's what he told us hahahaha.

Dinner later in the evening with Bella, Shi Chia and my dearest bff Amanda. Happy Birthday love, I hope you like what we got you!

Strictly Pancakes for dessert!

Then we concluded the night by heading down to Rebel with some others. I finally get to meet Desiree after so long! It's sad how we always say we want to catch up but whenever we meet, we're always rather high so we talk a lot of crap but don't really do much updating hahaha.

Stephy, Heidi, Desiree.

And of course, finally having supper with my ex-wife, Ivy Seah after so long. <3

Slept only at 6plus in the morning, it's amazing how I can still wake up on time for church hahahaha!

Jasey Rae

2011-12-05T20:16:00.000-08:00

I’ve never told a lie and that makes me a liar.
I’ve never made a bet but we gamble with desire.
I’ve never lit a match with intent to start a fire,
but recently the flames are getting out of control.

A short breather

2011-12-04T17:03:00.000-08:00

Japanese buffet lunch at Kuru kuru restaurant with Stephy poo. Very much a long waited meal for her I suppose. The cheesy scallops were the best!

Then after, a short trip to town for shopping. I haven't shopped in so long! I got myself a dress too ^^

Dinner later in the night at a German bar/restaurant known as Paulaner Brauhaus. The ambience was amazing and so were the Pork rib knuckles, German sausages, Rosti, Apple cinnamon pancakes, ice cream and extremely smooth german beer. I need to go back there for more food in future. Serious.

My favourite little cousins came along too <3

And hello! A shot just before Sunday Service begins hehehe :)

Awwright back to work! I'm going to continue working on my Portfolio now!

Word

2011-12-02T15:24:00.000-08:00

“A slavish concern for the composition of words is the sign of a bankrupt intellect."

December

2011-12-01T21:19:00.000-08:00

FYP has come to a temporary halt, now it's all about focusing on my PD. I met up with my advisor today and she has some changes for me to make for my first half of the portfolio. Knowing that I have barely 19 days to complete all 11 articles, she expects 2 articles from me every week. I foresee myself going into this writing frenzy for the first two weeks of December. I'd have to juggle other stuff as well. I don't know if I can do this, like you know, spin really creative story angles and write them so proficiently. After reading some articles written by my own course mates, I'm starting to doubt my writing capabilities. I thought I was okay when it comes to writing but god, no. I think I'm bad. I pale in comparison to the people in school and obviously that doesn't do me much good when the accessors are going to compare the various Portfolios to be graded.

I was just briefly reading through the past articles that I've written back in Year 1 which I have included in my Portfolio. One word to describe it, atrocious. (As much as I have been hearing this word so often nowadays because of FYP)What was I thinking? What kind of content was that and why did I even have the nerve to write such a terrible article? Can you believe I thought it was good? Why do I write and write and still not amount to anything? So, I am going to edit it entirely. I'll be revamping the first half of my Portfolio, and continue working on my second half. Not to mention, I'll have to come up with storyboards for broadcast hardnews/feature stories which must be recorded and compiled, also within the short span of 19 days. Between all that would also be the deadline of my FYP submission. God help me.

Promises

2011-11-26T11:58:00.000-08:00

Our word is so faint and feeble,
Broken by the slightest breeze or breath.
Our hearts are, they're so deceitful,
Sick and filled with lies that lead to death.

The Vaccines

2011-11-22T18:48:00.000-08:00

I love them

When you love somebody but you find someone
And it all unravels and it comes undone

Sunday with Hawker

2011-11-20T20:46:00.000-08:00

Received the most unexpected text from my dearest Hawker Bernadette last night. He said he felt like going to church with me so I agreed. I haven't seen him in about 9 months and gosh! He looks so much fitter now I kept asking if he hit the gym often. Although the answer was an obvious no. Hahaha.

For the many years that I have known him, today is the first time I ever found out that he can speak Jap. Simply because he was whatsapping a friend in Jap. Like ARE YOU SERIOUS?! You never told me you knew how to speak Jap. I only know you speak Indo! So yea, new insights hahaha.

Don't go back to Indo before you meet me again okay? I still have so much to tell you. Please please approve his student visa asap. I have yet to have a good talk with him, and I can only afford to do so after my really tight school schedule is over :(

TGIF

2011-11-18T14:05:00.000-08:00

When was the last time I said this? I've never really had the chance to appreciate Fridays ever since this semester started. Probably because School life has been such a breeze. I mean, how stress can you be from only two days of school a week?

But then it took me a few weeks to realize that two days of school also equates to having better time management because we have nearing deadlines for our project to meet. Not to mention juggling all that with the completion of our Portfolio. And so this entire week has been a rush. Mid term assessment was this Wednesday followed by a Test that we had. Then having to stay back till it was dark yesterday just to complete poster drafts which had to be submitted by today.

Suffice to say, I enjoy the company of my schoolmates anyhow. I can briefly recall the funny conversations we have during class. Plus the assumed sexual innuendo we accuse each other of when what was really meant in those sentences were purely innocent but probably sounded suggestive because of the play of words. "That's what she said", if you get what I mean.

Crubbingggg tonOight! I'm guessing there will be many people going judging from the discussion on where to head to on Friday throughout these few days. See you, if I see you there!

Labyrinth

2011-11-14T01:16:00.000-08:00

I have a whole fucking lot to express in this space but I don't even know how to put these feelings into words. I feel so limited and inadequate in my vocabulary because this conflicting pent up emotion is smothering me and I do not know how to even let it out. I am a whole fucking mess and I don't even tell this to the people close to me because nobody will understand. I am the complication, how do you deal with that? I don't want to be spiralling down to my old ways, I'm just seeking for a balance. I don't need to feel extravagantly happy all the time. I just need a consistent emotion. When was the last time I went on like this in my blog? I usually pen my words down with careful thought. It intrigues me the way I react when my mind runs too quickly and wildly I can't even catch what I'm saying or thinking and I try to write but I can't pen these fucking thoughts down. For a moment there, I think I've snapped. For a moment there I think I've lost it. And then all of a sudden I think I know how to handle this and come up with a solution which is often rash and dubious. Thoughts and conclusions made after 12 are often questionable. I thank God I never do what I tell myself to do at 2am in the morning, when I can't go to sleep. Things such as grabbing my phone in the middle of the night and calling just to tell them what's been on my suppressed mind for so long or running out of the house to knock at the door of somebody I miss. Things that I'll probably regret doing when I wake up in the morning. My perpetual concerns bug me all through the night.

I'm going to turn in now, this has been a colossal waste of time. My plans for tomorrow would be to aid a friend in an entire exploitatary essay (oh yes how I love writing to ease myself of things) and to embark on a new novel which I've just purchased. Goodnight.

11/11/11

2011-11-12T14:27:00.000-08:00

Anybody really took this date seriously? Like really waiting for the 11:11 timing to come and made some epic wish in hope that it will come true? I think it's bull... And you'll say "omg but this day only comes once in your entire life!" Yea, but so do other dates. Today is the 12/11/11. It only comes once in my life time too. I'm sorry I don't see the hype about this. My apologies for not being in the scene.

In any case, 11/11/11 was still a good day because I finally met up with my brothers and sisters from other mothers. We've all been so busy with our own commitments we hardly have the time to go out. I remember the times when every Friday was 'Family Day' for us. It all stopped ever since this year started. But I still like how whenever such meet ups are planned, all of us will make a point to turn up. So yes! Full attendance was what we had! Yay!

Heidi, Za, Wendy <3

Wendy and I did our nails before meeting the rest. Mine costed 3buxx, hers was 128buxx. My nails are trash compared to hers hahaha.

I'm so glad you initiated to plan for this dinner Muddy!!!

Hello cool indie boy.

I wish I had Ryan's legs. So smexy. It makes him look good in jeans damn...

Gerveeeeeee!!! Smooches xoxo!

Brandon and Theresa. So cute together!

Awesome company on a Friday. I missed you babies so much. So glad we finally met up :)

Tuesday bluesssss

2011-11-07T21:29:00.000-08:00

Today was a room-packing, muffin-baking, music-exploring, team-brainstorming, novel-exchanging, food-experimenting, window-shopping,long-distant-walking day. A very well spent public holiday indeed. School tomorrow, meh. Goodnight babies! xx

Hello there, the angel from my nightmare

2011-11-07T00:38:00.000-08:00

Whuddup!

2011-11-04T15:27:00.000-07:00

Back from a stay over at my cousins' place. We had lots of fun doing girly stuff together like painting our nails, eating junk food, curling on the couch to watch the telly and talking about problematic boys HAHAHA. Even though I'm the oldest, and my cousins are relatively younger than me, well, girls will always be girls right? Same old boring topics that you boys can never comprehend. Just like how you guys talk about your violent video games and your own lust over hot girls hahaha.

So I came home with a mild cold which somehow turned into a fever. I think it's the erratic weather that's causing so many of us to fall sick. I spent my night blowing my nose into tissues and by the next morning, the full tissue box was empty. That serious.

On a completely different topic, I found out that what I have been looking forward to for the past half a year isn't gna happen anymore and I am utterly disappointed. Word. For the past 6 months it has been my motivation to get through the day and just when the time is nearing, I get news that it isn't gna come to past. Had wanted to vent an entire post here to make myself feel better but I decided not to because I'll sound like a complete psycho. Nope, not worth an image tarnished.

I am a fiasco when it comes to handling and maintaining relationships with people. I never like to initiate a conversation, or call them out. People are usually the ones making the effort and I'm usually just on the receiving end. Perhaps only those that I'm really comfortable with. But then again, it's just a handful. I can be friendly, but I'm not exactly the most sociable person you'll meet. I don't step out of my comfort zone to meet new people, I don't try to gain the acceptance of others. Maybe because it's exhausting, and maybe because I don't find the need to do so. For you, I've tried. But if all that wasn't enough, then I'm sorry.

I suppose I should be popping some more pills and snuggling under the sheets to sleep this cold away. That should conclude my Friday night. And once I'm up and feeling better, I should be looking at accommodations for schooling life in the laid back down under.

Please let me recover fast, I still have a movie date on tomorrow :'(

Minimalist

2011-11-01T23:38:00.000-07:00

Yep, I stare at my long nails all the time contemplating if I should ever get them trimmed because it can be annoying at times but then decide not to because they do look pretty after all.

Then I start to think of the outfits that I should probably wear the next day and realize that I do not have much clothes to wear, or maybe I do not feel like wearing any of the clothes that I own currently.

And then there's my hair which does not have a fixed parting so I always fiddle around with it because I can't decide to have it parted on the right, left, or the middle.

Then there's my shoes which I do not feel like wearing that's why I'm bare footed.

And it occurred to me that marriages in the 21st century are no longer arranged by parents so I have to find my own boyfriend.

These are my first world pains. Haha so boredddd. Have a great week ahead guys! xx

Happy days like this

2011-10-30T21:38:00.000-07:00

I received two compliments from neighbors just this morning, none of which I'd want to gloat about as much as it makes me feel good about myself (hehe). Church was radically amazing because of the message preached today. There was a personal touch to it. At least for me. And then when shopping around the malls and entering a random furniture stall, we stumbled upon a man who started telling us about his life story and how much a living miracle he was. I am not exaggerating this one bit but apparently, he told us about the troubles he had faced and how God, yes God made a way for him. I felt comforted listening to him share because it made me feel like as though my relentless beliefs about Christianity has just been justified.

Then meeting the project mates after lunch for a discussion over at Starbucks which often sidetracked to unrelated topics whatever-have-yous and roaring laughter. Well...it was productive I suppose? Haha. Dragged the boys with us to look at lingerie and they've never been this awkward all their lives hahaha.

Dinner with Daddy and needless to say, I know he loves me very very very much. I am so thankful for the family.

Nov's gonna be a busy month. But it also means coming close to having the last Sem in school wrapped up :)

The kill

2011-10-29T15:33:00.000-07:00

Songs; because too much said still always end up superfluous anyway.

Day out with Boris

2011-10-27T20:25:00.000-07:00

Dragged myself out of bed despite the stormy weather today. I snoozed my alarm for a couple of times but knew that I had to wake up no matter what. Boris sent a text over to check if I was up. Thank God I was hahahaha.

So down to Strictly Pancakes for brunch. Pancakes and Earl Grey Tea, and Boris. Perfect combi HAW HAW HAW. He's enlisting on the 3rd of Nov, finally. I think it's been far too long. Talking to him and updating him about my life was really funny. He would always have funny comments and really weird remarks to make.

Like how when I was complaining to him about school and the people who made me unhappy.

Boris: Mass comm people all like that one, just because their English pipi piakpiak only

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA WHAT IS PIPI PIAKPIAK?!?!?!

Off to town for a walk and the arcade. Played a couple of arcade games just like the old times hahaha. I don't think I'm bad at Tekken at all ^^ Oh yes, and listening to Skrillex throughout the entire journey in the car, how can I forget! I still can't believe you like Skrillex too hehe. Wub wub wub wub wubbbb!

You are a cinema, I could watch you forever~

Thank you for making me laugh so much today!

Please take good care of yourself in the army Boris, I don't think it's gna be too tough on you physically cos you enjoy working out so much haha. I'll be looking forward to the stories you'll be telling me once you're out of camp! :)

Early morning pleasures

2011-10-25T20:58:00.000-07:00

Salmon scrambled eggs and English Breakfast tea before photography class!

Sunday

2011-10-23T17:54:00.000-07:00

Lovely morning complemented with a perfect combination of English Breakfast tea and Apple Cinnamon muffin to kick start the day.

Lovely weekend

2011-10-22T23:33:00.000-07:00

Hello gorgeous people! The University Fair on Friday wasn't too bad. I didn't really have to head down for it since I've got most of my stuff planned out but still, it was good to take a look at some other Unis available. Not to mention I met up with many familiar faces. I missed you Joachim! So glad to be able to see you even though it was just for a short while.

The Korean dinner was satisfying and so were the chocolate truffles at Awfully Chocolate which we had for dessert. Oh, and so was the idea of skipping clubbing that night a Karaoke session. It is so much more meaningful and fulfilling to be spending our night singing our hearts out instead of getting wasted. I love you Amanda for always being so compromising!

I do not have much to talk about nor do I have any pictures to share. All I know is I had a great Friday night and my Saturday has been ideal too.

I.CAN'T.WAIT.FOR.DECEMBER.

Can never emphasize that point quite enough.

Suck it and see

2011-10-20T15:18:00.000-07:00

Your love is like a studded leather headlock,
Your kiss, it could put creases in the rain.
You’re rarer than a can of dandelion and burdock,
And all those other girls are just postmix lemonade.
- Arctic Monkeys

Such a waste of pretty mornings

2011-10-16T12:21:00.000-07:00

One Sunday morning, I woke up on the wrong side of bed and my mum decided to add on to it by dissing everything I say and do. Ended up with a slight argument and here I am at home, giving church a miss because I am not in the mood to listen to anybody talk/preach or even say anything.

Sigh. My brother's still asleep because of a late night he had. I think I'll wake him up to accompany me for lunch or something in a bit.

On a lighter note, I can't wait to see Gervais tomorrow!!!!!

Oh btw, I haven't done this in a long while. Please keep me entertained! Formspring

Stay

2011-10-15T00:27:00.000-07:00

Mayday Parade's new album released on the 4th of October this year.

Oh can you tell, I haven't slept very well
Since the last time that we spoke, you said
"Please understand if I see you again don't even say hello."

I'm already addicted to all 12 songs. I can't help but have this on repeat.

#rants

2011-10-14T01:51:00.000-07:00

Joasseph told me the word for it would be 'epiphany'. But whatever that is, as long as it comes to a point where you feel like everything you've been doing feels pointless, that's when you realize that you need a change in your life.

I enjoy deep meaningful conversations over a cup of coffee or a meal with people who are level headed. Somehow or rather, it makes me feel that at least, I'm not the only over-thinker left. Most of the time, I don't know how to put into words the way I feel, not because I don't want to but maybe because I have this constant notion that nobody runs on the same frequency as I do. Most of the time, I'm right about this. I don't bother arguing when there are conflicting ideas because they just don't see things the way I see it. I'm peculiar in my own way and I have strong believes to certain things. End up being mocked as 'traditional'. And no, not even a tad affected by this haha. I hope I'm making sense.

In any case, I am in dire need for time to pass me by so quickly that I wouldn't even notice it. First week of school is over and even though 2 days are suppose to feel like a fleeting cloud, I still dreaddddddd it. To make matters worse, the meeting we had this Wednesday just reminded me of the upcoming work we'll be embarking on. Everything's piling up and deadlines are already round the corner. Sheeeeeeesh! Three years of Poly life and I've never come close to getting use to all this.

The thought of what's gna happen next month makes sick. I need a stress reliever. I think I'll go shopping soon.

The final lap begins

2011-10-09T17:15:00.000-07:00

I've got to step out of this endless paradigm so that I can have a bigger and better picture of things. It's so unlike me to be sinking into this state because I'm usually a cheery/bubbly person, clouded with whimsical fantasies and so staying happy is definitely my forte. Okay, maybe I'm not sad. Just bothered about the things that have been happening. I hate being worrisome because it gets me distracted. I.WANT.OUT.

Coincidentally, school resumes tomorrow and I've already planned my outfits for the week. It's not too tough a chore since I only have to turn up for classes twice a week. Mondays and Tuesdays. *skips around* On the other days, I'll probably be running around places in preparation for my further studies after Poly, going to bookstores to stock up on novels to read (I am a complete bookworm) and yes, working out with my cousins! Oh and of course completing whatever assignments tasked to do (mehhhh). 15 more weeks of such routine before Poly life officially ends.

Can't wait to get out of this place. Can't wait to enter a whole new phase in life. Can't wait to leave this country.

You have no idea how much I yearn for all this to come to past so fervently.

An abstract off the novel

2011-10-08T16:59:00.000-07:00

“ The fact is, I had become addicted to David (in my defense, he had fostered this, being something of a “man-fatale”), and now that his attention was wavering, I was suffering the easily foreseeable consequences. Addiction is the hallmark of every infatuation-based love story. It all begins when the object of your adoration bestows upon you a heady, hallucinogenic dose of something you never even dared to admit that you wanted - an emotional speedball, perhaps, of the thunderous love and roiling excitement. Soon you start craving that intense attention, with the hungry obsession of any junkie. When the drug is withheld, you promptly turn sick, crazy and depleted (not to mention resentful of the dealer who encouraged this addiction in the first place but who now refuses to pony up the good stuff anymore - despite the fact that you know he has it free). Next stage finds you skinny and shaking in a corner, certain only that you would sell your soul or rob your neighbors just to have that thing even one more time. Meanwhile, the object of your adoration has now become repulsed by you. He looks at you like you’re someone he’s never met before, much less someone he once loved with high passion. The irony is, you can hardly blame him. I mean, check yourself out. You’re a pathetic mess, unrecognizable even to your own eyes.

So that’s it. You have now reached infatuation’s final destination - the complete and merciless devaluation of self.”

- Elizabeth Gilbert (Eat, pray, love)

Every word for it.

Butterfactory with the girls

2011-10-07T01:51:00.000-07:00

First things first, out for a dinner date with Bella. Been so long since we hung out like this. We were whatsapping the other day about how long we've not met. So since holidays have been extended, we decided to party together just like the old times!

Peanut butter shots were great! Thanks for the recommendation Bella!

Since the new timetable for school has been released and we do not have school on Thursdays, so.... are you thinking what I'm thinking? More ladies nights to come HEHEHE!!!

And lastly before I go,

Happy 21st Birthday Boris! Have fun at Rebel tonight and I'll see if I can drop by MBS for a visit later :)

Peekchas fer uuuuu

2011-10-05T00:15:00.000-07:00

It's not all of it but it's the best I can do because the sizes of these pictures are so huge I have a hard time uploading them.

Day 1
On board the plane. My baby boo boo brudderrrr.

The first gift to us to Thailand was an Orchid hehehe

First steamboat meal

Stephy and Jacob! They have Baskin Robbins in Bangkok too!!!!

Day 2

Ze mudderrr and ze brudderrrr

Day 3

This is the handsome dude I was talking about that time. Anyone know who he is? Enlighten me please. I really like him very much trolololol.

Bryan, Heidi, Gerald at one of those street markets.

Day 4

Day 5

Sandwiched between two aunties HAHAHAHAHA

My bro says this looks delicious, but I thought it looks kinda wrong. Idk.

Jump shots in the middle of nowhere in the airport before leaving hahahahaha!

Alrighty I'm done! Thanks for scrolling through everything. SAWADICA! CAP BOON CAP!!!! ( I hope I spelled them correctly)

BACK FROM BKK

2011-10-02T21:57:00.000-07:00

The shopping, food and massage were the highlight of the trip and it was the best decision to go free and easy instead of a package tour. Got to really experience life being around the locals, haggling of prices, really awesome street stalls and exploring new places on our own. Oh yes, and a couple of Thai words that we picked up over there.

OH OH and I managed to take a picture with a Thai celebrity according to the locals. I swear I don't even know who he was but the whole point is, he was really good looking. And I stood right next to him while the media was taking pictures HAW HAW HAW!

I'll make an entire post of pictures on the trip once I've gotten the rest from Bryan. It'll be really soon so stay tuned ~

Running all over

2011-09-25T17:12:00.000-07:00

And so, the past few days have been rather busy for me, running all over the place meeting people and catching up with those I haven't seen for a long time. And for those who have been complaining how long I've MIA-ed, you can stop complaining now, I've made it up to you hahahah.

Thursday was quite a rush, down to Sogurt to meet Wendy for a short while, was intending to stay there to read but due to time constrain, I didn't get the luxury of it. Baby I'll meet you again because I haven't finished telling you everything yet!

My cute bestfriend was one of those who complained that I've gone missing for a long time even though I really felt that it was him who didn't contact me. Anyway, despite him calling me "lousy" for the entire day, he was a real sweetheart to buy me Spicy Mala Fishballs and Milk tea when I was hungry and penniless.

Then on Friday, headed over to Desiree's crib to have a mini catch up session which I felt still was not enough because I think I left out a lot of other stuff. That's the consequence of not meeting for so long!

We then headed down to Rebel/Zirca for the night with a few others.

I've got to mention this! I tripped and fell on the steps in Zirca when I was rather high and I woke up next morning with a slightly sprained ankle and bruises all over my leg. Luckily for me, the sprain wasn't a very serious one hahaha. I'm sucha klutz.

Saturday was Muddy's belated birthday dinner! We had Seoul Garden and all I did was spam all the beef because it was really the best out of everything else.

Oh yes, and I met up with Boris, if any of you even know who he was to me. He happened to be in town too and so we decided to meet. To be honest, I haven't seen him or even spoken to him in months and I really didn't know what to say to him. But I was glad that at least we met for awhile and as usual he'll talk about his friends and family and make me laugh. Since you've always been so upfront about your feelings, I'll say it too, you look really good now, nice jeans, nice hair cut. Yes, very handsome indeed Hahahaha! See you, maybe when I'm back from BKK or something :)

Speaking of BKK, I'll be leaving this coming Tuesday and I've yet to pack my stuff. I swear I hate packing but I'm really excited for the trip! Mum's gna be sponsoring for all the shopping and we've even prepared an extra luggage for the loots we'd be returning with. STOKED!

Self indulgence

2011-09-21T23:08:00.000-07:00

This is the end result of what I've found after rummaging through the many bookstores. Not to mention that I'll be borrowing a few more from my friends. Those in which I cannot find. Thank God they have it!

So plan for tomorrow, down to Sogurt for some froyo and silent reading. Sounds brilliant to me. On a random note, I miss Ryan. He just said this to me, " You disappear for so long, you don't want me anymore." Hahahahaha how cute!

Not in love

2011-09-20T23:28:00.000-07:00

I need a listening ear, but I hate to talk to people these days. How ironic. Still not quite done with my reclusive behavior. I'd rather seek solace in books and music and place my ridiculous notions of friendship and love aside. But I'm keeping a few close that's for sure. Looking forward to see Wendy this Thursday! I've got so much to tell her! And then to Desiree's place on Friday to chill before we head out for the night. When was the last time I saw that bitch again? Hahahahaha!

I'm home!

2011-09-17T22:06:00.000-07:00

I'm back from my short getaway babies! Did you miss me? Hahahaha

I had a great time during this short span of time, going to new places, trying out new stuff, spending time with Stephy and Jacob, binging excessively on food etc. And of course, I've got a spam of pictures to show you!

It's an overload of pictures so be prepared. Here goes!

Day 1, arrived at Genting after a super long ride. But at least I got to watch the entire movie of Eat, Pray, Love in the coach hehe!

Day 2, at the theme park! The rides were mad fun, especially the Roller Coasters, bumper cars and many other thrilling rides which dealt with speed and heights!

Cotton candy YAY!

I was afraid of falling off, hence the expression LOL.

Day 3, packed up and headed to KL!
I kinda forgot which day was which so well here's 2 days worth of pictures in KL!

The view from our apartment.

So most of the time we were eating away. I think the best kinds of food would probably be the ones by the road side. It's nice to be disconnected from the world for awhile. Since we all had completely no wifi in Malaysia. Only maybe once when we were at Starbucks haha!

During the nights we'd be chilling in front of the telly munching on chips, slurping our cup noodles and drinking slightly. This is the life yo.

It was an exhilarating week! And I should be starting on my jogging plan to make up for the week's worth of binging. Slightly more than a week of rest and I'll be leaving the country once again for yet another short getaway.

I KNEW SEPTEMBER WAS GONNA BE GOOD!

Off to Genting/KL for a week

2011-09-11T20:26:00.000-07:00

Meanwhile, take good care of yourselves and don't miss me too much! xx

Busy busy

2011-09-08T01:14:00.000-07:00

I bought myself new shoes, 2 pairs of socks and lots of hair conditioner to massive spam my super dry hair with. There you have it, some useless info.

Been running around all over the place for the past few days. I'm actually pretty amazed with myself. On how independent I have been, finding out things on my own, looking people up and heading down to foreign places without help from anyone. After getting most things done, I get a sense of satisfaction. Hehehe.

My parents are the best! For every request that I present to them, they've never once said no to me. Always trying their best to give me all that I ask for. Obviously I don't ask for absurd stuff okay. You'll find out soon enough once everything has been confirmed :)

And oh yes, I've been reading quite a bit. I've got a whole list of books awaiting me :)

This month has been smooth sailing so far. Thank God.

Notes In Constellations

2011-09-06T00:40:00.000-07:00

This is what keeps me sane at 12.40am on a Tuesday morning.

Maybe we should all take time to read this

2011-09-04T21:12:00.000-07:00

I was shooting a scene in my new film, No Strings Attached, in which I say to Natalie Portman:

“If you miss me. you can’t text, you can’t email, you can’t post it on my Facebook wall. If you really miss me, you come and see me.”

I began to think of all of the billions of intimate exchanges sent daily via fingers and screens, bouncing between satellites and servers. With all this texting, emailing, and social networking, I started wondering, are we all becoming so in touch with one another that we are in danger of losing touch?

It used to be that boy met girl and they exchanged phone numbers. Anticipation built. They imagined the entire relationship before a call ever happened. The phone rang. Hearts pounded. “Hello?” Followed by a conversation that lasted two hours but felt like two minutes and would be examined with friends for two weeks. If all went well, a date was arranged. That was then.

Now we exchange numbers but text instead of calling because it mitigates the risks of early failure and eliminates those deafening moments of silence. Now anticipation builds. Bdoop. “It was NICE meeting u” Both sides overanalyze every word. We talk to a friend, an impromptu Cyrano: “He wrote nice in all caps. What does that mean? What do I write back?” Then we write a response and delete it 10 times before sending a message that will appear 2 care, but not 2 much. If all goes well, a date will be arranged.

Whether you like it or not, the digital age has produced a new format for modern romance, and natural selection may be favoring the quick-thumbed quip peddler over the confident, ice-breaking alpha male. Or maybe we are hiding behind the cloak of digital text and spell-check to present superior versions of ourselves while using these less intimate forms of communication to accelerate the courting process. So what’s it really good for?

There is some argument about who actually invented text messaging, but I think it’s safe to say it was a man. Multiple studies have shown that the average man uses about half as many words per day as women, thus text messaging. It eliminates hellos and goodbyes and cuts right to the chase. Now, if that’s not male behavior, I don’t know what is. It’s also great for passing notes. there is something fun about sharing secrets with your date while in the company of others. think of texting as a modern whisper in your lover’s car.

Sending sweet nothings on Twitter or Facebook is also fun. in some ways, it’s no different than sending flowers to the office: You are declaring your love for everyone to see. Who doesn’t like to be publicly adored. Just remember that what you post is out there and there’s some stuff you can’t un-see. But the reality is that we communicate with every part of our being, and there are times when we must use it all. When someone needs us, he or she needs all of us. There’s no text that can replace a loving touch when someone we love is hurting.

We haven’t lost romance in the digital age, but we may be neglecting it. In doing so, antiquated art forms are taking on new importance. The power of a hand-written letter is greater than ever. It’s personal and deliberate means more than an email or text ever will. It has a unique scent. It requires deciphering. But, most important, it’s flawed There are errors in handwriting, punctuation, grammar, and spelling that show our vulnerability. And vulnerability is the essence of romance. It’s the art of being uncalculated, the willingness to look foolish, the courage to say,

“This is me, and I’m interested in you enough to show you my flaws with the hope that you may embrace me for all that I am but, more importantly, all that I am not.”

- Ashton Kutcher (via alittlefragile)

Chanced upon this and I realized how true it is. Social mediums were meant to aid in our efficiency, but it seems to have handicapped us in many ways. Possibly even ruining the relationships we have with the people around us.

Hello September

2011-09-01T17:15:00.000-07:00

More to come, stay tuned! Hahahaha.

Islands - The xx

2011-08-31T21:11:00.000-07:00

Favourite Indie band.

In case you felt that the music video was stupid, then you've definitely not understood it.

Happy last day of August everyone, I'm excited for September. :)

Random Iphone snapshots

2011-08-29T16:27:00.000-07:00

My momo can be quite adorable at times hahaha.

My pretty dream catcher from my best friends :)

Over at Marche for a feast!

Stephypoo, let's go for the chocolate truffles @ awfully chocolate the next time round pretty please with a cherry on top!

In a language you can't read, just yet.

2011-08-27T19:22:00.000-07:00

I apologize if I've came off slightly standoffish, declining offers to head out to party whatsoever. Truth is, I'd rather withdraw into a more secluded place such as my bed, maybe reading a book or exploring new music. I know it's the Holidays and behaving in such a reclusive manner is just kinda queer. But maybe I don't really want to party after all. At least not now. Maybe I'm tired of interaction and meeting people. I reckon my life is a bore to many but I beg to differ. I very much enjoy the peace and quietness I get being alone. No, I'm not lonely. Being alone and being lonely are two completely different things. Sometimes being alone makes it a lot more fulfilling than the kind of pleasure you get when you spend it with big groups. I find it a chore to head out. I get this lethargic feeling all over when I know that I've obliged to some plans. Besides, the weather has been really kind lately, often breezy and rainy. Nothing beats cuddling up like this.

Moving on, I'm attempting to convince my Dad in taking me along with him to Germany this coming October for his business trip. He's pretty hesitant about it but I really want to go! It's a once in a life time thing and I can't afford to miss it. So I'm going to prepare a long speech and present it to him on why he should bring me along :)

Alright, heading out for dinner in a bit. Then back home to read hehehe. I swear I need alone time like this because starting next week, I'll be busy running all over the place getting my checklist ticked.

Semester break

2011-08-25T20:48:00.000-07:00

My last paper was today and do you know what that means? Holidays have officially started!!!! The moment I got home, I went into a deep slumber and only woke up in the evening. So I guess I won't be sleeping much tonight. I foresee a messed up body clock already :/

So first things first! Imma be out tomorrow for a midnight movie plus a quest in search of delicious Naan to eat! Actually, we already know the place but I haven't been there before so yea... haha! Been having an Indian food rampage lately. And I want to try the Indian yogurt salad thingy. I heard it's pretty good. Yes I love to eat. I enjoy trying new food and if eating would not cause me to gain pounds, it would definitely be my hobby.

Oh oh and I can't wait for my upcoming trips to Genting/KL with some friends and then about a week later, the shopping trip to Bangkok. My September's so packed with activities it's getting me all egggggciteddddd.

Be back in a jiffy with more updates. Meanwhile, happy holidays lovelies~

Friday

2011-08-20T14:05:00.000-07:00

One of the very few Fridays spent together with my babies since it was to celebrate Daren's birthday.

We didn't even take pictures of the Birthday boy cos he was sooooo late hahahaha.

It was a pretty fulfilling day since we all tried out some Indian food at some really deserted restaurant. Even though we were all kinda skeptical when the food was first served initially. The greenish dish! What was it called again? Spinach mutton or something? Yeah, it was the best. Despite it looking the scariest. Oh and we ordered too much Naan.

And then I was forced into playing DOTA. Yea you heard me. It's the first time in my life I've ever tried it and half the time I don't know what I was doing. Ryan picked some weird character for me. Called the vengeful spirit or something? God, I don't know. And I keep getting lost in the fights I can't even find myself HAHA. The whole screen was a patch of green and all I did was press "C" when they yelled for me to do so. HAHAHAHHA. Oh, and I kept respawning. I know I know, I was the liability to the team hahaha. Guys why do you even play DOTA? I hate that game. It's so difficult to play and I'm never gonna do it again. >:(

Nevertheless, I had a great time with this bunch of people. I've always enjoyed myself with them hehehehe :)

'Study break'

2011-08-18T14:41:00.000-07:00

Here's an extremely grainy shot taken at Butter Factory.

It's been more than a year since I stepped into that place. Definitely miss the atmoshphere, I wonder what took me so long. Haha.

And so much for a 'study break' that I'm supposedly having now since there's some tests coming up next week. Plus my team's selected for some pitching thingy which I honestly thought we would never even be able to make it. WHY?! I swear I don't want to be selected. I don't want to present in front of so many people cos it gets me all jittery sigh. I wasn't even aware my name was in the results page because I didn't bother checking until a friend told me. I really didn't think or want to be part of this!!! Sigh yai yai. So... wish me all the best in this pitch in which I'll be standing in front of my whole cohort to present. Honestly dreading it. I hope we don't win. I don't think we will hahaha.

Just for fun

2011-08-16T22:12:00.000-07:00

Yep, a lamp hahahahahha. The first person I thought of after reading this was Gervais. HAHAHAHAHA!

Been all sorts of tired

2011-08-14T01:59:00.000-07:00

If I could I'd love to run away from the hustle and bustle of this city, the fast paced life which I honestly resent. I'd love to leave this town, in search of green pastures to lay on, appreciate the tranquility of placid waters, and leave everything behind. Life here is so mundane and I want nothing more than to change that. I want to go somewhere to drown myself in books, somewhere fictional, sipping on tea or coffee, remaining silent and admire the humble things in life. I'm exhausted from talking, overwhelming decisions to make, worrying about how I should conjure my sentences to people around me in fear that I would offend any. I'm bored of people and for once, being alone actually feels good enough.

Last week

2011-08-11T21:21:00.000-07:00

Relapse of narcissism because it was a good hair day hehehehe

3 more days left to finalize my PD proposal and I've yet to come up with feasible ideas on how I should write all my articles. I'm currently having a writer's block with no flow of ideas and feeling the most inspiration-less.

I'm stressed with the work not done and stressed that I'm still not doing anything about it. So much for thinking of partying during the weekends when the deadline's on the 14th. Scratch the idea already.

On the lighter note, holidays starts next week and I'll be able to take a break from school. Period. Looking forward to the trips that I'll be making out of town, things to get done on my checklist plus a couple of other stuff I've been wanting to do. Can't wait!

#rants

2011-08-08T23:07:00.000-07:00

P.s: Just let me do this once, since I've got no one to whine to about this at all

To be blogging for the second time in a day, this is not what I had in mind. For the times I have always believed that my self-confidence was what made me shine and what kept me going all this while, I have my self-loathing days where I feel inadequate, mediocre and unspecial (no such word but yea)

I am not the top student in school nor am I someone who is specially gifted in anything. I can do most things but they are never exceptionally good. You know? Jack of all trades, master of none? Something along that line.

The thing about being able to do many things but not being very good in any, well it kinda gets frustrating because someone is always better than you. Not that I want to be the best, but I just want to be good enough. On par with the rest.

I'm sick of my own incompetency of not being able to do better. When your good is not good enough, when your best is still far from the ideal. This is shit that blows. The things you once took pride in just blatantly staring you in your face telling you " Hey you're not as good as what you thought you were after all" It hurts.

My supposed PD time is now spent on this verbal diarrhea which I intend to stop anyway because of its redundancy.

Despite all that, I've got the most loving parents, and the best friends in the world. They will always be my pillar of strength, people I fall back on. I suppose that should suffice.

Stephy poo

2011-08-08T13:39:00.000-07:00

My pretty gf just got a fresh new hair cut. Dayummmmm girl you're lookin' fineeee~

School's boring without her and she's probably the reason why I'm still willing to drag myself all the way there. I think you'll start attracting more lesbians from now on bby. Hahahahahaha <3

Crystalised

2011-08-05T22:29:00.000-07:00

"So don't think that I'm pushing you away, when you're the one that I've kept closest"

I'd Hate To Be You When People Find Out What This Song Is About

2011-08-03T21:09:00.000-07:00

So much thought put into this.

Ryan's 19th celebration

2011-07-31T19:04:00.000-07:00

Saturday way great! Because I got to meet my babies after such a long time. I've been looking forward to this day for quite awhile already!

Wen and I met up first to get the cake done. We all lied to Ryan haw haw hawwwww! But he believed everyone except me cos he said I don't usually act that way. But he knew I had to lie so he acted like he didn't know. Whuttttt? So difficult to lie to your bestfriendddd cos he knows you so well -___-

Final product HAHAHAHA!

Reached Holland V earlier because we didn't want the birthday boy to suspect anything.

Muddy buddy! :)

Holland V is a really nice place actually. Lots of interesting food. We should go there more often guys!

Then the highlight of the day arrived shortly. So cute hahahaha.

Over at Breko cafe.

This looks like some poster of the episode of F.R.I.E.N.D.S

The Singles Club.

CAKE CUTTING TIME!!!!

2cute2Btrue

This is all of us!!!!

I hope you had a good time Ryan baby <3

Final assessment

2011-07-29T21:42:00.000-07:00

Hehe it's finally over. Done with researching for places, heading down for a personal experience and writing reveiw articles! Gone are the sleepless nights and squeezing out of brain juices to get our articles done. FYP is overrrrrrr ~

But then it dawned on me today that my deadline for the first submission of my Portfolio Development is in 2 weeks time so... I should stop celebrating and start working again. Oh, life in the senior year. Ever so hectic.

Happy 19th Ryan! ♥

2011-07-27T00:03:00.000-07:00

I realized how few pictures we have taken this year compared to the previous. Probably because we've all been so busy with our own commitments we haven't really been hanging out very often. I miss the times with you Ryan.

Anyway, you're 19 now. Big boy already huh! I'm glad that you've matured so much more in your thinking but I know there's still room for improvement HAHAHA.

Thanks for everything. The times spent together, you always making fun of me. You're the only guy who dare say mean things to me, dare put me down so bluntly, whack me really hard, convince me to buy you things, share your stupidest experiences and disagree with me on almost anything. But thank you for being my best guy friend ever. Sometimes I get so frustrated and annoyed with you but I always turn to you for help at the end of the day. Be it school work, problems stressing me out, opinions, advice, suggestions,or even what to wear. It's always most comforting to talk to you about it. And I like how you always have opinions to everything.

Thank you for the little things you've been doing for me. I remember every single one of them even up till today. Thank you for always being so easily reachable. Always just a call away. I love you Ryan babyyyyy! Blessed 19th once again.

Can't wait to see you this Saturday <3

Leaving the baggage behind

2011-07-25T18:43:00.000-07:00

Been shopping for the past few days and it sure is therapy for the stressed out mind.

I love shopping with my brother because he helps me with the shopping bags except the ones from La Senza hahahaha!

Total damage for my loots? Nahhh I don't even wanna talk about it. HAHAHAHA!

This morning, I woke up as usual ready for school. Bathed and everything and was at the mirror ready to put on my make up until I saw myself. My face was swollen like a bitch and I looked extremely hideous! Like a monster or something. My eyes were so puffy and my face was like a ball. It was as though I had water retention or something. My neck was red as well. So obviously I couldn't go to school like that. Headed to the Docs instead. It's some sort of allergy reaction that I got. Only happens when I eat prawns BUT I DIDN'T EAT PRAWNS!!!! So apparently I'm allergic to another thing which I'm not even aware of. Dayummmmm.

I'm actually pretty excited for this Saturday cos I'm meeting my Family/Brothers&SistersFromAnotherMother/Babies/Favourite bunch and I'll be sure to bring the camcam along hehehehe.

Thoughts on a Friday night

2011-07-22T22:56:00.000-07:00

It's of late that I've started thinking so much, looking into the future, planning for what's going to happen next and what I'm going to do in life after poly. Yes I know I still have one entire semester to go but that's not a lot of time either.

To add on, I've also seen how time has managed to show us what really matters and what doesn't at the end of the day.

A whole labyrinth of thoughts, emotions, decisions that I've had. You have absolutely no idea what I've been going through. The things I desire in the past are no longer the same as today's. So many things have changed, I don't even know where to begin. Now as I look back, I'm choking on my own words. Everything I said and believed in the last time, I don't mean it anymore. I am my own discrepancy.

Many things are beyond my control and I guess all I really need now is faith to believe that everything will turn out for good. To be honest, I can't wait to leave this place.

That aside, this backache has been with me for ages and it still won't go away. I swear I'm too young to have a problem such as this. Sigh.

Before the worst

2011-07-19T14:42:00.000-07:00

Weekend

2011-07-17T01:12:00.000-07:00

Haven't been enjoying much because of the FYP and now that all the work is handed up,I'VE JUST REGAINED MY FREEDOM! Period, cos there's gna be a final presentation in about 2 weeks time and I'll still have to carry on with my PD stuff. But still, I'm so glad I can finally put this entire burden down.

So to celebrate, we headed down to Rebel hehehe gosh I miss that place so much! Always remember, less pictures means more fun. Because we always forget to snap pics anyway hahaha.

Iphone4 flash just too good!

Hi Wilson! It's been so long! So glad to see you there and thank you for taking care of me that night :)

All in all, it was one hell of a night. Dancing on podiums, bumping into people, running away from people, getting high and having a great time with my girls.

And then Saturday!

Random snap shot before I headed out.

This is how an indecisive girl's room looks like. Picking out countless clothes, trying them on and still don't feel good enough to head out. And I forgot to remove the cable HAHA.

This is my best guy friend Ryan whose dressing kinda reminded me of Justin Bieber. I accompanied him to buy underwear today HAHAHAHAHA.

Have a great weekend lovelies!

Blessed 19th Ivy baby!

2011-07-14T10:06:00.000-07:00

Are you touched at despite how I've been so busy with school work that I almost don't talk to you anymore, I still remember your birthday and called you up to wish you at the strike of 12? You didn't do that for me lor.... You were suppose to but you were bathing...Hahahahaha!

Happy Birthday my dear wife! Sorry I can't celebrate with you today. Dinner on me the next time round. Love you! ♥

K

2011-07-13T05:21:00.000-07:00

Woke up suddenly at 4am and I couldn't get back to sleep. So here I am blogging via the iPhone.

Firstly I just wna say that you were the most accommodating person I've ever met. How you used to allow me to do whatever I want when we were out. Pick the movies, choose the place to eat, take silly pictures of you (even though you were extremely camera shy) and I would tease you cos of your accent and you'll laugh it off just like how you'll laugh at me when I get scared over the small stuff during movies.

There were times I admit I get slightly frustrated cos you are not good with words and I wished you could say something nice to me when I was down. But I know that's the way you are and you have always been such a good listener. Patiently listening to all my complains. I know I complain a lot.

I know this is so difficult and I hate communicating with you through text only because mediums such as this are never good enough compared to face to face interactions. Everything you said last night, I understand and as much as I wanted to prove you wrong, I didn't know how to.

I have never been in such a situation so I really don't know what to expect. To me it felt more like enjoying what I have. But you were right, it's miserable and hard. And the timing and everything just sucks. But all I know is I liked how you were always so real. You don't even flirt when you started talking to me. Idk how to put it but it wasn't the same as the others out there. I know you want me to stop all this but I can't help feeling so heavy all over. And the worse part is, not being able to tell you how much I miss you because you don't want me to talk to you that way anymore because you said it's gna make things harder.

In any case, if you ever feel like talking to me again, I'll be here. I'll listen to you like how you always have for me. Enjoy yourself in uni. And lastly, I never saw you as a chore. Right from the start. So you don't have to apologize for that.

This one's for you and me

2011-07-12T13:15:00.000-07:00

I miss this guitar so much, even though it doesn't belong to me hahahaha!

Good music can be so hard to find. I remember the many times be it when we were happy, sad, angry, bored, restless excited, feeling hilarious, there was always this guitar around. How Ryan would always play songs for us with this and we'll always sing along.

I was at his place yesterday since he was helping me out with my FYP once again and I saw this baby. Picked it up and strummed randomly. It still had my scribblings all over it. Years ago when I wrote my name all over the guitar and he didn't even mind. Hahahha. Those were the days. Going over to his house felt ever so nostalgic. Haven't been there for so long even his mum was like " Wahh Heidi big girl already ahh!" LOL.

I may not meet my best friends that often anymore. Partly because we're all really busy but when we need each other's help, somehow, we'll always be there. Thanks for doing my layout for me. Plus the advice and suggestions you give along the way when I tell you stuff. You've been of great help. Both you and Wendy. I can't thank you guys enough.

Rush hour

2011-07-10T01:04:00.000-07:00

So after a crazy few days of mad rush hour, completing our report, writing articles after articles and cracking our brains for a layout design, we're almost there. Not exactly done but well at least, I've done my bit and I'm really satisfied :)

Been wanting to post these up but I didn't have the time so here they are.

The day Stephy and I went on a mission trip for our food review over at Arab street and then down to Haji lane. This is why we love the dslr hahahaha.

FYP isn't as stressful if you don't keep harping on the fact that you've got a lot of work to do but just stay focus and get whatever you need done. At least that was my solution to it.

I met Ryan up today after such a long time because I needed his help in the layout design. I'm absolutely clueless when it comes to designing things, not to mention a layout for a website. It was really nice of him to oblige to help me as he sat there solid for 3 hours working on MY project even though he complained " Every time I ask you go out with me you say cannot cos you busy, then now got problem then come and find me" HAHAHAHAHHA

Okay, still got some more stuff to be done. Wish me all the best! I'll be back in no time.

Geeks

2011-07-09T03:37:00.000-07:00

Time check: 3.30am

Hi I'm having a stay over at Steph's place. We're both busy rushing our Final year Project assignments plus the Final Report. There's so much work to be done and we're running out of time so we're working into the wee hours of the night. At least we're done with one item and so now we're having a break. But I figured that I shouldn't be taking a break because I'll end up falling asleep so I should just take this time to blog.

We're really ugly now. Like wearing our glasses and messy hair all pushed to the back. And I believe our eye bags have darkened after tonight. You seldom get to see us in this state hahaha.

Alright, break time is up! Gna start on the report. Maybe I'll reward myself with Macs breakie in the morning or something. I KNOW WE CAN DO THIS! GO GO GO!!!!

Just for fun

2011-07-02T20:04:00.000-07:00

Hahaha back from a short food hunt! Got the pictures, had most of them edited. But we still have more places to go before we can write the article.

Obviously I didn't eat all of them because that would be considered gluttony.

HAHAHAHA PRATA!!!!

Ignore Jacob's enormous nose, can you see me in the reflection? I was actually doing a twist hehe ^^V

Okay that's about the nonsensical pictures that I'll post up. Should be heading down to Rebel/Zouk tonight because...How much work can actually be done within the few hours even if I don't party it away?

July

2011-07-01T21:14:00.000-07:00

Upbeat, uptight, fast-paced, rushing for time. Everything that I am now. I almost forgot that I have a social life.

I've gotten a lot of work done lately but I've also got a lot more I've yet to do. Pressed for time, as always. But I've foreseen all this ever since this semester started. It's all about good time management. We'll all get by anyway.

I haven't been talking to many people. I miss my friends, I miss hanging out. I'll be sure to meet everyone of them once all this is over. For now, a short getaway would be ideal. Like how I'm heading for a food hunt tomorrow which is actually for the Final Year Project but still sounds like fun, and then Transformers 3D on Sunday. Stoked for it!

July, please be good to me.

The truth is

2011-06-27T20:35:00.000-07:00

And if I pray for one more thing, it would be time.
Just a second I could pause,
Just one more minute I’d exhaust.

I've been so stressed out and caught up with myself lately. Someone tell me everything's gna be okay. I need a hug :(

One day when the sky is falling

2011-06-26T18:44:00.000-07:00

My updates are getting shorter and I have less pictures to post. That's because I have been rushing assignments like crazy. Am still in the midst of getting them done. And I have an aching back. It's been a week already and it's still not well. So lazy to explain why it even ended up like this.

I promise myself to have more plans of having fun once all this is done. I just went shopping just now and bought myself some clothes so I'm happy. When I'm happy, I do my work better. I'll come back again if I have something to talk about. Haha.

Btw, Keegy Chang is the cutest thing alive hehehehehehe!

Hi, I know you'll see this.

2011-06-24T21:09:00.000-07:00

I know there's whatsapp, viber, skype and talkbox (HAHA) and I'm definitely very thankful for that but... Y U NO COME BACK TO SG NOW TO WATCH MOVIES WITH ME EVERY THURSDAY?!?!?!???!?! :'(

Happy 17th ♥

2011-06-22T12:11:00.000-07:00

I love you baby brother!

To-do-list

2011-06-20T19:06:00.000-07:00

• PD submission which includes CV, profile piece and 10 over articles
• M314 GA (graded assignment)
• FYP meetings/ articles to complete
• UTs (understanding tests) throughout this week

Wow my life revolves around acronyms. Just by looking at the amount of workload is driving me crazy. Not to mention there's another GA that's coming up. I've been a convert ever since, heading straight home after school to get stuff done. I can't even eat cos I'm way too stressed up. Guess it's a good time to lose some weight.

Hahaha

2011-06-18T21:52:00.000-07:00

I had to put this up because I swear I thought it was kinda cute ;)

Keegan

2011-06-17T23:06:00.000-07:00

It's the 17th. It means Keegan is flying off today. Oh damn :(

Anyway, been spending a couple of days with him hehe. It's like movie every other day because there's nothing much to do in Singapore anyway. So in total we actually caught 3 new movies together. Xmen, The hangover2 and Green lantern. All in about a week? That's a lot for me.

So ytd was the last day we went out because he's leaving LATER :'(

He brought me to this restaurant at Mandarin Gallery called Wild Honey. It's pretty cool because there's a really nice ambiance there and they use Ipads to take orders for food hahaha!

"Can you please just look into the camera for once?!"
" No! I feel so weird I'm camera shy!"

"Please just at least stop moving around and smile? Just once!"

"K I don't care you're gng to take 9 shots at one go on your own NOW"

Someone got his bb fixed after ORD-ing. Hahahha.

While waiting to get into the theatre.

Have a safe trip back to Aussie Keegy. I'll miss you. See you when you're back during December :)

School resumes

2011-06-12T20:39:00.000-07:00

School resumes tomorrow and to be honest, I haven't really done anything productive throughout this 1.5 weeks of holiday.

My weekends were fulfilling despite it not being much of a difference anyway since it's the holidays. Everyday's like PLAY DAY. Went on a 'date' with Keegan on Saturday and caught Xmen first class like finally after dinner. He's returning to Aussie on the 17th to continue his course in Uni over at Perth. Only be done in 3 years :( But at least he's coming back every 6months. Prolly gna spend more time with him this coming week before he leaves. Arghh why do you have to go? :(

Hahaha alright I should really start packing and choosing my clothes for tmr. It's the standard routine yet again....

It's a peaceful Friday

2011-06-10T22:22:00.000-07:00

Today was great! I'll update this space with more pictures soon :)

T-t-t-talk!!!

2011-06-09T15:52:00.000-07:00

I met my long lost wife after so long. She's been MIA-ing since god knows when and I took the initiative to call her up the other day to ask her out on a date! I only initiate when it comes to her HAHAHA!

Despite how sucky your attitude can be at times, so much so that I feel like punching your face, I can't deny how you'll always be the one I run to for comfort and during times of need. I like how we don't don't meet up as often as we used to in the past but when we do, we have endless things to talk about. Maybe that's why you're my wifey right? hehehehe <3

Bumped into Krystal at Rebel later at night. Gosh it's been quite awhile. She kept insisting we take pictures because our outfits were pretty similar.

Arghhh she's so hot I always look like pfffft next to her in pictures :(

Hahahaha I'm really back to normal now. It's not that I haven't been normal the whole time but yea, I guess only my bff knows what I'm talking about over here hehehe ;)

Curly wirly

2011-06-06T15:10:00.000-07:00

Harrowz I haz curls in mah hairz naowwwwww!

I just got my hair curled yesterday and oh boy, it feels so short now! I'm kinda okay-ish with the end result because I swear I thought it was gna be disastrous. I pictured myself with a lion's mane and not leaving the house until I regain my confidence hahahaha!

Didn't change the colour because I am a true fan of black hair. For the countless times I used to get my hair in all shades of brown, black is and will always be the best hehehe. I just really don't like coloured hair la. At least for now.

The hair dresser says it'll take prolly about a week before the curls settle and look more natural so meanwhile, this is how I look.

Okie dokie, Happy holidays y'all. Imma attempt to get some PD done for today before my lined up activities start!

Teeeeweeeee!

2011-06-04T16:35:00.000-07:00

Oooooo one hell of a night! One of the better few nights I would say.

Love how my best friend's always there for me hehehe.

Starlight

2011-06-02T17:32:00.000-07:00

Our hopes and expectations, black holes and revelations.

I just revamped my blog. It took me a really long time to figure things out because I suck at html codes or whatever you call it. But I made it finally!

My holidays have started yayyyy! But there's nothing to be envious about because I've got PD, FYP, graded assignments and such to complete during this period of time. This is senior year for you I suppose :/ I'm in dire need of someone to kick start some motivation in me. I swear I don't feel like starting on anyone of them despite it being a huge load of work. Need.some.motivation.here.

I have been a wreck of my own emotions lately. I don't know what I want, where do I go from here or what really makes me happy. I've been such a mess. Am I making sense? Lately I've understood more things which made me realize how much I actually don't understand at all. I want to know more, gain more knowledge, enrich myself further because being ignorant is frustrating. I chose to believe it's a phase where I'm stepping out from a childish live-for-the-moment teenage mentality into a slightly more mature plan-for-the-future young adult mentality. AM I EVEN MAKING SENSE OVER HERE OH MY GODDDD I'M LOSING MY MIND AS I SPEAK!!!!!

Extremely redundant blogpost over here, except the song of course! Imma update more since it's the holidays. Lots and lots of activities ahead of me. Hehehehe. Oh damn, I hate my eccentric nature. Gotta curb it a little. It's too....disturbing. I know this is abrupt but...till then.

Trying something new hehe!

2011-05-30T21:08:00.000-07:00

Hello! Am trying to blog with the iPhone now so this post is gna look slightly weirdddd. I hate auto correct cos it changes some of my words into something else and the meaning of the sentence changes.
Anw I'm finally well and far from the sickly and feverish me. In fact I was out on Saturday even though I thought I would jst spend my day at home. Upon a random call from Ryan to meet up, I decided to go ahead with it anyway despite still being slightly sick. I haven't seen him for quite awhile anyway. It's been a long time since the both of us spent time together. Like yknow, just the both of us kinda thing. Not really in a group setting. It was really good :) had a great time teasing each other and laughing at our own lameness and stupidity (mostly him la) hahahaha! We walked around town aimlessly because the whole point I guess was just to spend time with each other. You're so right about us being more than just good friends because we're so comfortable aroud each other :)
Caught the movie Dylan dog which I honestly thought was just show about dogs. Turned out to be a comedy horror -.- HORROR LOR WTF! But the show was good on a whole. We met up with some others in the night to watch the Barcelona and Man U match. I still can't believe the distance I walked just to catch the match! I'm not even into soccer haha oh well!
To sum up, my weekend was better than I expected. Got to really sit and talk with someone important to me whom I swear I thought was gna drift away from me, satisfied my cravings for Oreo latte and had lots of nice food hehe!
Amazing how time flies! This is the first time this year I had days like this. I still remember how we used to go out and do everything together in the past! And it's amazing how we're stepping into the mid of 2011 in just a few days. Holidays start this thursday! So eggcitedddd! Got lots of things I have in mind to do. People to meet, places to go, things to do. Stoked for it!
Alright shall stop here, blogging on iPhone is exhaustinggggg!

Everything else

2011-05-27T18:33:00.000-07:00

Maybe that's why he's my brother. Because we do all sorts of silly things together and despite all the nonsensical bickering we have every once in awhile, he can be a real gentleman and sweetheart.

HAHAHAHAHA BLOODY STEPPERS!!!!

ONE MORE HAHAHAHA!

Any girl who wants him must go through me first! Hahahaha just teasing :)

On the side note, I've been sick for the 3rd time in two months. Must be the terrible weather in Singapore. It sucks to be sick when the week is about to end because you can't go out and have fun like the rest. Haven't been to sch for 2 days because of my fever and even though it's just been two days, I've missed out on a lot of briefings and meetings. All of which are very crucial to the final year. I hate missing lessons too :( Thank god for Stephy who constantly keeps me updated about what's needed for school hahaha.

Neeways, have an ejoyable weekend ahead everyone. Jacob promised me Strictly Pancakes once I'm well. Yummmmmmzzzz. Stokedddddd for it!

Don't know what to title this.

2011-05-25T17:41:00.000-07:00

I feel a strong need to have to talk about this even though it might seem like a small issue to many. But honestly, I think it's pretty major and perhaps the world could be a better place if people even try to practice it.

Many times when people do something for me, like giving me a gift, giving me a treat or perhaps doing me a favour or just even trying to help, I always always remember to say thank you. So much so that I get comments back like " How many more times you want to say thank you to me?" Yep because I keep repeating it. And sometimes I too forget I keep repeating the number of Thank Yous myself because I really feel that as a person I need to be appreciative. I mean like people do things for you out of their own goodwill. They didn't have to do it but they did so it's only right that you be grateful and thank them. And sometimes even when someone does something nice for me, I try to think of future opportunities to bless them back because I know how good it feels when someone does something nice for you and you just want to do something in return for them. And you do it not because you have to but because you want to. Have you heard of a certain quote that goes something like this..

Blessed are those who can give without remembering and take without forgetting.

I think it's really beautiful because it actually sums up a lot of things. If you appreciate someone, it doesn't just bring joy to the person but to yourself too. Because you appreciate, therefore you feel blessed to have that person in your life. And that person on the other hand feels glad that you see their significance in your life and feels important too. It's a win win situation don't you think? And also when you give, give out of the unconditional and not expect anything in return. Because if you expect something back, then that isn't giving. That is a trade. You want something out of it and if the other party doesn't give you anything back, you feel bitter. To me, that defeats the purpose in giving. If this is the kind of mindset that you have, I suggest you don't bother giving at all.

I'm not trying to portray myself as oh-so-noble at this point in time because I know that I do have my own flaws too. I'm just saying all this now because lately I've been witnessing some incidents around me which I honestly can't stand at all. You can agree or disagree with this post but it's really just my two cents worth.

Friends we haven't met in awhile.

2011-05-22T21:51:00.000-07:00

Hello people! How was your week? Had fun? Mine was pretty much interesting. As much as I had countless thoughts running through my mind all the time, I really had a blast this weekend!

Saturday was eventful! Started out by meeting Eugene for a dinner. He wanted to give me a treat as a belated birthday celebration for me. And besides, the last time we saw each other was eons ago so yep! Perfect timing hehe :)

Went to a Korean restaurant called Sarang at Orchard Central. I'm no fan of Kpop and the music there is absolutely not my thing but the food's really good!

How retarded can you get?

HAHAHAHAHA!

Eugene thinks I haven't changed much. Still the same little girl who enjoys taking stupid pictures of him. Well you haven't changed much either because you're still as accommodating as before. Always letting me chose what I want and caring for me from a far. Thank you for always doting on me. :)

So then we headed down to Altitude. Really cool place. It's 72 storeys highhhhh (if I didn't get it wrong) and you can really see the whole of Singapore from up there.

The three of us again FINALLYYYYY. Eugene, Heidi, Desiree.

Joachim's earlobes can actually fit those light sticks in. Dope or what?!

Family Reunion hahahaha <3

I swear I don't know what were we doing HAHAHAHAHA!

Gary!

Camillusssss!

Then after having enough fun up there, all of us headed down to Rebel together to meet some others.

Random shot in the toilet before we took our leave.

Over at Rebel, I met my bff Amanda there hehehe.

Models of the night!

Lesson learnt: Never ever wear heels into clubs because it's really gna kill

I walked out of Rebel bare footed because my feet hurt like crazy. We headed to our final destination, Nana. Some Thai disco which really doesn't dig at all. But at least I got to see how's it like there. And no, don't think I like it and doubt I'll ever go there again.

All in all, it was an extremely fun night! Well at least I thought so. I haven't had late nights out like this for quite awhile and it makes such occasional events seem a lot more fun.

And I know that I know that in all of your eyes I'm just like a kid and you guys always feel obliged to look out for me. Since the time we first knew each other till now. I guess some things just don't change haha. Thank you Eugene, thank you Desiree, thank you Joajoa!

19th

2011-05-16T22:28:00.000-07:00

Birthday celebration for 3 days straight! Thank you everyone for the wishes, dinner treats, gifts and surprises! I really really appreciate them very much! :)

First celebration during my birthday eve! Which was also Bryant's birthday hahaha.Thanks guys for the dinner and the countdown hehehe!

Birthday boy and girl.

Then on the actual day, had an epic 3 generation celebration with Mum and Grandma because both their birthdays fall on the 17th while mine on the 14th. Close enough la hor? hahaha.

Not forgetting on that day itself, Stephy,Joshua, Amanda, Ivy and Desiree planned with my parents and gave me a surprise over at my place. So so so touched :')

Then on the 15th. With my favorite bunch of people, also known as family to me :)

Fav pic with Ryan.

Yknow they're so adorable they actually remember the random things that I like and mentioned before. I swear it was just casual remarks that I passed and they actually got those things for me. So now, I've got a gigantic Justin Bieber poster waiting to be pinned up in my room and a beautiful dream catcher which I'll prolly hang right above my bed. Hahaha. Thank you babies. You guys are the sweetest.

Oh yea, and I realized every year, my birthday present from them always has something to do with Justin Bieber. Just like how last year, they recorded a song for me using the melody of Baby - Justin Bieber. HAHAHA.

Thank you every single one of you for making my birthday so enjoyable. I really appreciate everything you've done for me and I definitely feel very very blessed to have people like all of you in my life. :)

For the first time

2011-05-12T03:06:00.000-07:00

Drinking our cheap bottles of wine
Sit talking up all night, saying things we haven't for a while,
We're smiling but we're close to tears, even after all these years
We just now got the feeling that we're meeting for the first time

Good times.

2011-05-06T23:52:00.000-07:00

This is me on a happy Friday when school has ended for the week!

I had a well spent Friday night having Bah Kuh Teh for dinner followed by some awesome Gong Cha. Then being able to witness a wedding proposal made me smile till my cheeks ached. The guy was so sweet I can't help but envy his wife to be. It's so heart warming :) And then star gazing into the night sky and lo and behold.... we saw a SHOOTING STAR that went right pass us. It was so amazing and beautiful. All we did was just to scream in amazement and forgot to make epic wishes. But witnessing it was something good enough already.

Jordan Tay, we need more days like this! Thank you for completing my Friday with me! For all the funny conversations and catch up that we had, plus the many interesting occurrences we had today, it beats going to clubs and getting yourself all wasted right? And it's a good thing that partying just doesn't dig anymore. The simple things in life is what makes it meaningful. hehe :)

Love my family, love my friends, love my life. I'm so overflowing with love now I just wna go round and give everybody a big hug hahahahahaha!

020511

2011-05-03T21:50:00.000-07:00

And if you'd ask me, it was probably one of the best days I had so far. The 3 of us don't meet often together like this but when we do, we just can't stop talking!

Laughed until my abs were fully formed. LOL. I love you girls so much. Thank you for the nice nice day and food hunt as we go around for random nice snacks and shopping and din tai fung and camwhore and never ending conversations and plans for our next outing and funny inside jokes and....I'm sure there was a lot more right? The day felt so satisfying. I feel so so so extremely comfortable around you girls. Hehe :)

Can't wait for our next meet up babes! TWG NEXT HEHEHE *sekret sekret*

May.

2011-05-01T01:05:00.000-07:00

I can't help but fully utilize the wonders of iphone camera applications. Too amazing, too fascinating. Hahahaha!

Flats and Sharps.

2011-04-29T23:06:00.000-07:00

"Heidi Seah!!! You are up there!!!! " - Jordan HAHAHAHAHA (inside joke)

My life currently revolves around books and piano scores. Been reading and playing the piano A LOT. If you didn't know, yes I do play the piano. Just kinda stopped for a couple of years but I feel like picking up some new scores and brushing up my skills a little. Hahaha. It's true, musical instruments are better self-taught and explored because that way you're not limited to what your teacher teaches you. It's all about being inquisitive and independent. The best musicians of the world today usually picked up their instruments on their own.

Speaking of books, there's absolutely nothing to lose when you dedicate time into reading. You gain new insights when you read and you get to improve your language! Lately, it's been all these laid back things in life that I have started to appreciate once again.

I'm trying very hard to find a way to get out of this country. I want to go on a holiday. Thinking of heading over to Orlando to visit Jierong during the holidays. Mum's fine with the idea but there are many other obstacles. Please work out for me!!! I really don't wna miss this opportunity!!!! :(

U smile I smile~

2011-04-25T21:28:00.000-07:00

Cheer up baby doll. You look prettier when you smile. You know I'll always be here for you like how you've always been there for me right? :)

Must.Get.Started.On.Article.

Well spent weekends! From dining at Billy Bombers to the promised Never Say Never movie to Easter Sunday to Jamming just like the old times. Very fulfilling indeed.

Billy Bombers is actually not bad considering it my first time there. I can't believe anyone can actually sleep through a Justin Bieber show. I mean it's too amazing to be put into words! *cough Ryan cough* But it's okay la he wasn't feeling well. Not his fault haha! Oh and Stephy actually persisted and came to church with me on Easter sunday. Kinda surprised cos whenever she told me she would like to visit church one day, I thought she say say only. HAHAHA. Last but not least, I enjoyed Jamming. Two hours is definitely not enough. I can't believe I can still rmbr how to play the keyboard even after so long. I thought I totally lost it already. And I miss watching the guys on their guitars. Boys who play the guitars have always been appealing to me hahaha!

Life's a beach ~

Better get started on FYP article now!

Good Friday!

2011-04-22T01:29:00.000-07:00

My faci's at the back! Hehe!

I have this tendency of always looking back on the year before when a festive season happens. Like I try to recall what I did for this season exactly a year ago. Last year during Easter day, I stayed over at Desiree's place with a few others, whipping up a meal with whatever we could find in her kitchen during the wee hours of the night and then using the mahjong table as our dining table to eat. If there's one thing you ought to know about me, it's my powerful memory. I'm really good with dates. Even my mum and Ivy agrees.

Long weekends deserve good planning. Because we seldom get that. I've found great company to watch Justin Bieber's Never Say Never with me. You're not going to bail on me right Ryan? You've already promised! Hahaha.

So it's retail therapy as planned for Friday. Gna hunt for some more dresses and shoes. And I'll prolly get started on my article writing for FYP after which. On a random note, my aunt wants me to head over to her place for a Sandwich Party with my other cousins. No comments on this. -___-